4 Answers - (Newest, 6 November 2010)A male
age 41-50, anonymous writes:
me and my fiance have been together for almost 4years and we have 3 kids and a eldrely grandma to take care of we are not as intimate as we wre in the beginning we might have sex once a month if that she hardly goes anywhere but stays on the phone all day long talking to friends shes not hiding it or being sneaky and i know almost who it is she tajks to all the time but im 47 and shes 26 she wants to marry but im scared she will leave sooner or later but we was very intimate in the beginning but now we dont do anything that much
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A female reader, Laura Myer 
+ ?, writes (6 November 2010):
It sounds as if you were more 'lovers' than you were long term partners. Both relationships are very different. I couldn't marry my lover yet we have a great time when we get together. Long term partnerships are based on intimate communication. Do you think things will be different just because legal paperwork is signed and there is now obligation brought into your relationship? How about just enjoying one another as lovers? Sometimes we feel we want to settle down with our lover, but the dynamic is that this relationship, is all that it is. Laura A male reader, anonymous, writes (6 November 2010):
Me and my fiance have 3 kids... WTF, you've had 3 kids and you've not gotten married... yep, she'll leave... ............................... A female reader, petina1 
+, writes (6 November 2010):
Lots of things in the way of your relationship, kids, grandma , age difference. Against all the odds do you think this can survive. Being on the phone, or internet or texting mates all day long seems to be the generation thing these days, so that's quite normal. Is the kids, grandma and you getting neglected in other ways. How's the house being run, do you work, lots of things to consider. If she can communicate with friends all day long, then unplug the phone sometime and ask her to communicate with you. I see that with some men that they can cope with most things but not the lack of excitement in the bedroom. If thats the only thing worrying you then you should look again at your role in the household. Lots of responsibility there and if your fiance is looking after everyone, that would be the last thing on her mind, she may be too tired. You could always help out with the running of the chores, grandma etc. Make things easier that way. But i don't know what that situation is, just you have lots in your way, maybe at the end of the day, this just doesnt suit you and you will have to evalue what it is you really want. Good Luck ............................... A male reader, Sageoldguy + ?, writes (6 November 2010):
May-December relationships are fraught with peril.... largely because you are "of" different generations... I wonder how it happens that you and she have spawned 3 children and, just now, are you asking about getting married. That sounds like a time reversal has occurred. Anyhow... you have to decide just how long this arrangement will continue. IF you and she both think it is for the long term... then YOU have to stifle your "scared" and marry her and take your chances.... ............................... All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft
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